Behind the Laptop //024: The Saboteur Shadow Archetype: How to Stop Restarting & Step Into the Magician
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If you’ve ever felt like you were right there, right on the edge of a breakthrough. Only to lose momentum, pivot into a totally different plan, or spend weeks “getting ready” without actually starting, then congratulations. The Saboteur Shadow Archetype is running the show behind the scenes.
It’s not that you’re lazy.
It’s not that you “don’t want it badly enough.”
It’s that your relationship with time, alignment, and decision-making has been hijacked by shadow archetype patterns.
And when the Saboteur shadow is running the show, your results reflect it:
Failed launches that never make it past the idea phase.
Endless planning that never turns into action.
Starting over and over again instead of building momentum.
Feeling like there’s one right way to do things, and if you don’t follow it perfectly, you’ve ruined your chance.
Projects that stay “in progress” for months because you’re working on the wrong priorities (aka, too many things at once)
In my Shadow Work Methodology, the Saboteur sits in Channel 4 of creation. Its light counterpart is the Magician Archetype, the part of you that works with precision, presence, and timing, finishing what matters without burning out.
If you’re new to this series, start here for context:
What Is the Saboteur Shadow Archetype?
The Saboteur Shadow Archetype shows up when your relationship with how things get done becomes rigid, perfectionistic, and disconnected from the present moment.
You convince yourself there’s one “correct” way to create what you want and if you deviate from that path, you’ve failed. This creates a cycle of overplanning, overcomplication, and restarting, rather than finishing.
Unlike the Child Shadow (which doubts if you’re allowed to have what you want) or the Prostitute Shadow (which doubts if you’re worthy of it), the Saboteur Shadow believes you can have it, but only if you follow a specific, perfect plan.
Shadow Archetype at a Glance: The Saboteur
Channel: 4 of Creation
Core theme: Perfectionism, timing anxiety, overplanning, restarting
Shadow driver: “There’s one correct path. If I can’t do it ‘right,’ I should stop and start over.”
Core wound & belief system:
“I must find the perfect method before I begin.”
“If the plan changes, I’ve failed.”
“Presence doesn’t matter, sticking to the original plan does.”
“I have a bad relationship with time.”
Light Archetype at a Glance: The Magician
Core theme: Precision, presence, timing, completion
Light driver: Doing the right thing at the right time with the right scope, then finishing.
Core Truth & Embodied Power:
“I work with reality as it is: present, responsive, exact.”
“I know what moves the needle now.”
“Pivots are accelerators, not setbacks.”
“I know exactly how much time is required, and what tasks need to be prioritized to make what I want happen, when I want it.”
What It Looks Like When the Saboteur Shadow Is Unintegrated
Feelings
Frustration at “never getting anywhere” despite never ending effort
Restlessness and impatience with timelines
Overwhelm from too many half-built projects
Feeling like you are always late or always early, but never where you need to be at the right time
Thoughts
“There’s a right way to do this. I need to find it first.”
“If I pivot, it means I’m starting over.”
“If it didn’t go exactly as planned, I ruined it.”
“There’s not enough time to get everything I want done.”
Beliefs
Only one correct path to success
Deviations = lost opportunities
Planning matters more than presence
Time is limited.
There is a right/wrong way to do all things and if you don’t see it or do it in that way, you’re a failure.
Behaviours
Restarting projects at the first sign of change
Weeks of planning with little action
Overcomplicating execution until it’s impossible to start
Mis-scoping (trying to ship 10 things at once)
Trying to juggle too many projects at once
Unable to prioritize
Negative Manifestations
Inconsistent income and audience trust
Months-long delays on launches/offers
Perpetual “almost there” without arriving
Creative exhaustion from constant resets
Rebranding, creating new offers over and over again without a clear line of intention between them
How to Alchemize the Saboteur into the Magician Archetype
Alchemizing this shadow isn’t about grinding harder or forcing productivity. It’s about developing a positive **relationship with time and alignment: precise scope, present-moment action, and clean follow-through.
You’ll get the fastest results here if Channels 1–3 are integrated: Lover (desire/worthiness), Sovereign (self-permission/decision), Warrior (energy mastery). The Magician is the last frequency of creation within the manifestation process <link manifestation process here>.
Practices to Embody the Magician
Exercise #1: Practice Deep Work (and Deep Rest)
The Saboteur is always “on” running, calculating, trying to stay ahead of time but instead of being the master of their time and attention, they are always in the wrong place, doing the wrong thing because they are never present in the moment.
The Magician knows how to focus powerfully when it’s time to act, and then release fully when it’s time to rest. This rhythm of switching on and off is what collapses timelines to make creation easier and more precise.
How to do it:
Schedule a block of time where your only job is to work deeply on one project. No distractions, no multitasking. Aim for a minimum of 40 minutes, but ideally 2–3 hours where you can immerse yourself fully in completing the project in front of you.
This isn’t time for planning or figuring out what you should be doing, come in already knowing the one key task you’re tackling, then do it. During this period, your only priority is completing that task. When the time is up (or the task is done), stop. Step away, rest, and let your nervous system fully “turn off” before you transition into the next part of your day or decide on what task to accomplish next.
Why it works:
The Saboteur scrambles energy by trying to hold 5 unfinished things at once which creates too many questions in the mind in order to maintain focus. Practicing deep work teaches your nervous system how to harness focus in bursts, and deep rest teaches it that turning off is safe. Together, they recalibrate your entire relationship with time.
Exercise #2: Daily Energy Tracking
The Saboteur guesses how much time and energy things take, then gets frustrated when reality doesn’t match the fantasy. The Magician understands that awareness is the first step to mastery and begins by observing what actually is.
How to do it:
Keep a simple energy and time log for your day for a few days/weeks. No need to micromanage, just jot down the bigger anchors:
When you start and end your deep work sessions.
How long your gym trip, errands, or meals actually take.
What time you feel your energy peak, and when it dips.
The key is to compare how long you thought something would take versus how long it really did. You’ll start to see your natural rhythms and patterns of energy which will give you better control over scheduled rest periods, deep work periods, and also understand how much you can hold during one day/week/month.
Tip: Don’t over-schedule or obsess over every detail. This isn’t about “controlling” how you spend your time, it’s about awareness over how long things actually take. Over time, you’ll develop a realistic sense of how much you can handle in a day, and eventually you will drop this exercise from your practices as you won’t “need” to document your time to “know” how long is required to complete what you need to.
Why it works:
Tracking dissolves the illusion the Saboteur hides behind,“I don’t have enough time.” Instead, you get data. And with data, you learn how to plan according to truth, not guesswork. The Magician builds trust with time by seeing it clearly.
Exercise #3: Project Timing
The Saboteur treats every idea like it’s urgent. The Magician knows how to hold an idea, feel its timing, and act only when the moment is right.
Part of shifting out of sabotage is learning how to classify your projects by timing and importance. Not everything is meant to be acted on today but that doesn’t mean it isn’t valuable or isn’t the “right idea.”
How to do it:
When a new project idea comes to you, ask:
Is this a Right Now project? Something that needs my attention right now/within the immediate future
Is this an Up Next project? Something important, and needs to be done soon, but there are a few other tasks that need to be completed first
Is this an In Queue project? A potential future idea, worth keeping, but it’s not urgent and there are other more important things that need your attention first
Keep a simple list where you categorize ideas into these three buckets. This way, nothing gets lost, but you also stop scattering energy across every impulse.
Give yourself permission to trust the queue. A powerful idea doesn’t lose momentum by waiting; in fact, it gets even better when you give it time and take action when it’s ready.
Why it works:
This practice creates clarity. It helps you see your business more systemically, understand the real weight of your projects, and avoid the self-sabotage of constant pivots. By honoring timing, you turn chaos into order and ensure your energy is invested where it counts.
Note: In an upcoming From the Codex article “Project Management 101: Epics vs. Projects vs. Tasks” I’ll take you deeper into this framework, including how to structure your big-picture epics and break them into actionable micro-steps.
Final Thoughts: Your Next Step in Shadow Integration
The Saboteur Shadow keeps you in a cycle of almost-finishing; draining your time, energy, and income potential. When you integrate it into the Magician Light, you collapse timelines, follow through on what matters most, and stop wasting energy on perfectionism.
That’s it for this edition. I share a new one every Monday. Join the list here so you don’t miss the next drop.
